Conversations,  Rants,  Thoughts

On Wasted Prayers and Useless Gifts

Have you ever received what you considered a useless gift? Or felt like forbidding a prayer that was made with seemingly good intentions? I hope you answered YES to both ‘cos misery loves company and right now, misery is me…

My love language (how I show affection) is GIVING. I’m quite a selfish being so I absolutely hate to share myself or my stuff with others. This means when I give, especially of myself, it signifies an ultimate show of love and affection. What this has done is make me place gifts very highly to a point where a gift for me is only as good as the thought behind it. Simply put, don’t give me a gift I have no use for!

I know the popular belief is that the intention behind a gift is what’s most important but I disagree! I think that makes people lazy and act like they don’t have sense. Take me for instance. Say you get me 3 dozen roses and a box of mad expensive chocolates to celebrate a win of mine or something; the intention is seemingly honourable and the thought loving, but first of all, I don’t even like chocolate! Neither do I care for flowers. Some plants [trees and stuff], sure, flowers though, HELL NO. I’d much much much appreciate like a Spa Day instead, even just a massage would do cos these bones be tired. But ultimately, just get me RAM! Not the animal oo, the one inside computer, cos the RAM consumption these days is mad…

I have a friend – Mrs. O; awesome human, one of the kindest alive. She knows I don’t much care for marriage so she makes it a point to rile me up about it every chance she gets. How? Always saying prayers for me like ‘May you find a good husband soon’, and I’m always there like ‘Which kain rough play be this fogghusake?’. Because first of all, I wouldn’t know what to do with a husband even if you put him on a plate but that’s a story for another day. My problem? She’s wasting my prayer quota.

Seriously though, we need to do better, put more thought into our gifts. Can we at least try to KNOW who we’re getting gifts for, the things that matter to them, the things they actually NEED? Can we do that? PLEASE?! It doesn’t help anyone when we give people gifts to make ourselves feel good, gifts are supposed to make the recipients feel good. You, the giver, is supposed to bask in the atmosphere of the recipients joy, that’s how God said it should be (don’t ask me when/where please).

So next time you want to give a gift, or offer a prayer up for someone, can you please calm down and be sure it’s what they need? At the very least, it should be something they’d appreciate, something that means something to them. Don’t come out here and have us feeling ungrateful for not fawning over your ‘gifts’, and then still have the effrontery to get mad. Because it’s your fault, you’re the one with zero gift-sense. Jesus didn’t die for you to be moving mad.

St. Valentine’s Day is about a week away. This means you people will be throwing gifts around like confetti. Me? I don’t kuku have strength for nonsense so let me just give y’all my list of personal preferences:

  • Instead of high-heeled shoes, get me some COMFY sneakers or boots.
  • Instead of sexy dresses and expensive hair, can I please have an ergonomic chair? My back is killing me from all this computer use and I honestly don’t have anywhere to wear those dresses to, so…
  • I love coffee and I’m not ashamed to admit my addiction. So mugs are always welcome. Big ass mugs with crazy inscriptions on them get me every time.
  • Computer RAM is a must-have. I always seem to be in need of it. I don’t know who makes apps these days but they need to be calming down; RAM don cost!
  • If you can get me a gaming laptop (send an email for precise specifications), I just might marry you.
  • I need an apartment. Can you pray for/about that?
  • I don’t want a husband or children anytime soon, maybe not ever. Please channel the prayer for this wish to something else, like a job with mad pay!
  • Have a German or Japanese visa you aren’t using? Gimme please…
  • Money and Food are the way to my heart, ALWAYS. And I HATE to cook so no raw food items biko, it’s well prepared meals I need. Tainkyu.
  • See ehnn, I need Security Certifications. But the way my account balance is set up right now… Let’s just say you pay for a few of those for me and I’ll be in your debt (for about 2 months).

Too much? This isn’t even the half of it but you get the gist. So please be advised. You could drop your list in the comments too; I want to check something, in case I decide to send some gift baskets out

In the meantime, go on back about your business, and let’s please try not to be unfortunate in our gifting.


  • Angel

    Yeah one useless prayer and jokes family and unwise friends say ” may she get a good husband ” likeeeeee did I send you ? Abi I don’t know God ? Or I don’t know what I want ?
    I so much appreciate developed minds conversations yeah , money 💰 yes not for designers yeah , can you say me a prayer to fight my fears and dreams? Sure wanna gift me ? Get me nice shoes ( snackers ) I know I need money very important wanna see if I can help this female gender out there whom needs me most to bring back their confidence and right kill their fears , wanna chill with me ? Get us a blut , please hope you if you a guy you won’t want us to sex ? Cause it’s not gonna happen, I love more and developed mind am a lawyer you know right? Respect me I have a lot of people to help don’t stress me .

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